We’re human beings, and at some point, we doubt ourselves, the people around us, and of course, our connections with others, especially relationships.
Sometimes we can be part of an amazing relationship, yet we still have doubts or create doubts in our heads that end up being the cause of a breakup.
What makes a good relationship? Is it true love like we see in the movies? Probably not.
The truth is, most of the time, we think something is wrong in the relationship, but that’s just based on what society tells us. Most of the time, the media shows you that a relationship needs to go a certain path or do certain things to survive, but that’s not true at all.
If you want honest relationship advice, keep reading to find out if your relationship is meant to be successful.
1 . You don’t have the same interests and views
One of the first things we look for in a potential partner is similarities. We want them to like the same music we do, enjoy the same hobbies and so on. But why do we do that?
Do we want a copy of ourselves to date? You might be an amazing person, but dating someone like you could be extremely boring long term.
Besides, when two people are too alike, the couple tends to focus on that instead of the real problems. For example, if someone cheats, the other person would think about everything they have in common as a reason not to break up.
Of course, it’s nice to have some common interests, but when two people have different views and interests, they enrich each other. Think about how interesting it is to bring something new to someone else’s life, that’s exactly why people come into our lives, to teach us something, and the more they have to teach, the longer they’ll stay.
2. You don’t plan vacations together
Just because you are dating, that doesn’t mean you have to bring your other half everywhere you go. What happened to the girl’s trip? Or a solo getaway? These things don’t have to disappear just because you’re in a romantic relationship. We understand that traveling with your other half may sound like a great idea. Still, you can make many other trips by yourself or with some friends, which means you don’t have to be dependent on your partner to travel anywhere, and if you love your partner, you’ll miss them, which will only make your relationship stronger. Besides, as you’re aware, couples don’t share the same interests all the time, so maybe your partner prefers to chill by the pool in a 5-star resort, and you, on the other hand, would rather go camping in nature and hike every day. But why would you give up your desires and wills for the other person? You can still do everything you wish, so don’t let a relationship stop you.
3. You don’t always sleep together
Some people hate sleeping in the same bed as another human being, but society tells us we should sleep in the same bed if we’re dating or married. This is a common idea because people who share marriage and a family usually also share a bed. But not all of us are quiet and still in our sleep; some may snore, move a lot, and cause a bad sleeping environment for the other person. If your partner is a bad sleeper, you have every right and reason to prefer to sleep somewhere else. It doesn’t mean you don’t love them; it just means you value a good night’s sleep. The same applies to couples who hate cuddling. Many people don’t enjoy being grabbed or hugged during nighttime because it causes discomfort and unnecessary heat. It’s not that they hate you; they want to relax and sleep in peace.
4. You can be in silence for long periods
If you feel awkward whenever there’s silence between you and your partner, then that’s a clear sign that you are not comfortable yet or haven’t found the right person to be with. Silence shouldn’t be considered to be awkward. When a couple can be together without talking, their connection is super strong and goes beyond words. There are many relationship stages, and the first one always tends to be a little bit awkward, but with time, this awkwardness will fade away, and if it doesn’t, then maybe that’s not the person for you.
5. They don’t get along with your family
Meeting the parents is always a struggle. Will they like you? Will they not? Is it going to cause a breakup if they don’t? These are all common questions asked by those who are about to meet their partner’s family. However, even if your family knows you, they don’t know all sides of you, which means they are not always right about who you should or shouldn’t date. If your parents don’t like your partner or vice-versa, that is not a reason to break up. Holidays may be tricky, but as long as there’s respect, everything should go fine.
6. There’s arguing
Do you know what makes a strong relationship? The answer might not be expected, but arguing is a way of strengthening a bond. It can be a family bond, friendship bond, or a love bond. Nobody wants to have negative emotions, and some people hate confrontation, but arguing and conflict are present in all healthy relationships. Start seeing arguments as a portal to change to communicate and re-direction to a better path. The key here is how you both react to an argument. If you overcome it with communication and respect, then you’re on a good path to a long loving relationship.
7. No kids
When in a long term relationship, people usually hit you with “When are the babies coming?” or “When are we starting a family?” Even though these people usually mean no harm, they follow society’s guidelines of what a relationship should be, which is marriage, and then a family. We’re in a modern world, and nowadays, there’s no obligation or rules about having kids. Studies have shown that couples without children are happier than those who have kids. This is mostly because couples decide to create a family when they feel like their relationship is crumbling. A kid should never be a “problem fixer” because, in the long term, it just won’t work. Besides, when you don’t have kids, you have much more time to spend on yourself and your partner. Travelling, volunteering, working becomes easier, and so does the relationship.
8. You spend little time together
Sometimes life gets in the way, and even though you want to be with your partner as much as possible, it isn’t possible. This doesn’t mean there’s no love or passion in the relationship. It just means you’re human, and you have a life besides your relationship. There’s work, family, friends to divide your time with, and most of the time, it’s not possible to be 24/7 with your loved one. It’s important to trust your partner. Otherwise, the distance could cause a lot of trust issues and other problems. And if you trust your relationship, you already know that the other person is on the same page as you, and they’ll probably feel distant because they have other stuff going on, just like you do. We hope this list brought you some peace of mind about your love life. You must understand that each couple makes their own rules, and just because you’re a part of a minority, that doesn’t mean you’re in the wrong. A happy couple is a couple who lives by their own rules, at their own pace. As long as there are trust, love, and respect in a relationship, that’s what matters. Make sure to ignore whoever tries to tell you otherwise! There are no rules when it comes to love!